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YU News Service's avatar

"He really did. Honest."

-- Richard Bach, "A Life Spent Looking Through Binoculars: A Bird Watcher's Guide to Going Blind"

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Doctor Faustroll's avatar

"Don't be so hard on yourself, dead guy. Want to go out?

-- Lorena Boebert, "Giving The Natural World A Joyous Hand Job"

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YU News Service's avatar

"Normally, I'd say yes. Stupid elected officials really turn me on. But your I.Q. is so low I'm afraid I'd have to bring along a brick just to keep the foreplay interesting."

-- Jonathan Winters-Livingston, "Look What I Found In My Pocket!"

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Doctor Faustroll's avatar

"That Marianne Faithful slut

Was once, too, at the full, and round turdish whore

Splayed like the folds of a Skims girdle unfurled.

But now I only hear

Its over the counter, cheapish fake allure,

Retreating, to the breath

Of the foul-wind, expelled from Giuliani's rear

And shaken my shingles begging to be shot."

-- Uncle Matty "Perry Tom" Arnold, "My Life In The Bushes Of Friends"

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